Ever noticed how some kids will eat rice morning, afternoon, night, without flinching, but try giving them beans or vegetables? Suddenly, wahala. Now imagine that same struggle, but turned up to a hundred. That’s what feeding an autistic child can feel like sometimes.
Let’s talk honestly. No sugarcoating, no textbook definitions. Just one parent to another.
“He’s just being stubborn” We hear this a lot, don’t we? “Shebi you were picky too as a child?” But what if the issue isn’t stubbornness? What if mealtime for your child feels like a punishment?
Autistic children often have sensory sensitivities. That’s a big reason they might refuse certain foods. Not because they’re trying to stress you (even if it feels like it), but because their brain processes taste, smell, and texture differently.
Let’s break it down.
Why Autistic Kids Struggle with Food: It’s Not What You Think
So here's the thing. It's not always about being picky. Sometimes, it’s sensory overload.
Imagine biting into cold garri soaked in milk and the sound in your head is like scratching a blackboard. Or that boiled egg texture just makes your skin crawl. That’s what some kids are feeling. And since they can’t always explain it, they just refuse.
Others might have a very limited diet: maybe just bread and juice. And as a parent, you panic “How will this child grow strong with only bread and juice?”
But here’s where it gets even worse...
The Muscles They Don’t Use? They Don’t Develop
See, when a child avoids chewing tougher foods like meat, vegetables, or even swallow, they’re not just missing nutrients. They’re also not exercising their oral muscles. That can lead to delayed speech, poor chewing skills, and even gagging when they try new things.
Wild, right?
It’s all connected. Speech, eating, sensory stuff. It’s like a web. Pull one string, and others move too.
Could It Be Something Medical? (Yes, Get That GI Check-Up)
Now here’s something a lot of Nigerian parents don’t consider: your child’s food issues might not be just sensory. It could be gastrointestinal (GI) problems eg stomach pain, reflux or constipation.
And because autistic kids often struggle with communication, they may not say “My tummy hurts.” They’ll just push the food away, scream, or even throw things.
If your child cries during meals, eats very slowly, or avoids food groups altogether. Get a GI specialist involved. Rule out the medical stuff first.
What Happens if You Don’t Tackle Picky Eating?
Ignoring picky eating in autistic kids has long-term consequences. Nutritional deficiencies in Iron, calcium, protein, they don’t just appear out of nowhere. There are growth issues. Some kids fail to gain weight or grow well. Some have social struggles and feed trauma. Mealtimes in school or at parties become stress zones while constant battles can make the child associate food with anxiety. So yes, this matters. Big time.
But here’s the good news: you can help. And it doesn’t have to feel like war.
So How Do You Get An Autistic Child to Eat? Let’s Talk Strategy
Here’s where we get practical. Not miracle cures but tested, loving techniques that help over time.
Start Small. Tiny Portions, Familiar Foods
Don’t jump from bread to ewedu soup overnight. Start with what they already tolerate. Then very slowly introduce variations. If your child eats plain rice, maybe add a sprinkle of shredded veg on the side. Not in the food, just on the side.
Use Routine Like It’s Magic
Use the same chair. Same plate. Same time. Autistic kids thrive on predictability. Don’t underestimate how comforting a familiar mealtime setup can be.
Play with Food (Yes, Really)
Let them touch, smell, even smear the food before eating. It’s not wasting, it’s exploring. One day they’ll put it in their mouth. That’s a win.
Watch Out for Smell and Texture
That ogbono soup you love? Might be a sensory nightmare for your child. Try to vary preparation methods. Maybe the same vegetable steamed instead of blanched, or soft meats blended in sauces.
Keep a Food and Poop Journal
Sounds funny, but trust me this is gold. Track what they eat and how their body reacts. You’ll start seeing patterns: “Ah, every time he eats yogurt, the stomach starts turning.” Boom. Now you know what to avoid.
And the poop part? If bowel movements are irregular, hard, or too soft, it might explain their behavior during meals.
Use Gentle Encouragement, Not Force
Don’t force-feed. That creates trauma. Instead, use gentle prompts: “Let’s try one spoon,” and then praise the effort. Even if they spit it out? Praise. Why? Because they tried.
Consistency Is Everything, Even When You’re Tired
Here’s the truth: it’s not about doing everything perfectly. It’s about doing one thing consistently. Over time, the body and brain adjust.
If you try a new method today and give up tomorrow, the child gets confused. But if you stick to the same mealtime routines, even if they protest, they begin to trust it.
Be patient. This isn’t a 2-week program. Sometimes it’s months. But change does happen.
Let Me Tell You a Quick Story...
A mum I know in Lagos had a son who only ate a handful of meals. Just 3 varieties I think. For years. She tried everything. Begging o, shouting, bribing. Nothing worked.
Then she started a food journal. Noticed his tummy always acted up after fried foods. Switched to boiled plantain and made food playtime part of their day. Introduced mashed yam slowly, with his favorite song playing.
Now? He eats rice, eggs, and even beef. It wasn’t magic. It was consistency and understanding.
Not Every Child is the Same but Every Child Can Be Helped
Look, raising a child with autism in Nigeria isn’t easy. Between the stares, the unsolicited advice, and the cultural pressure, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. But you’re not alone. And more importantly, your child is not “spoilt,” “lazy,” or “just being stubborn.”
They’re navigating a world that often feels too loud, too bright, too fast and food is one of the few things they can control. So support them. Be patient. Keep records. Try new methods. And above all, celebrate the little wins. One new bite today? That’s progress.
If This Feels Familiar… Don’t Wait.
Book that GI appointment. Start the journal. Ask for help; from pediatricians, therapists, even other parents. The earlier you intervene, the easier it is to make real, lasting progress.